Social dating anxiety has a chicken-and-egg relationship to a person’s confusion concerning how to approach women. The person feels he does not know how to approach women, so he becomes anxious. Also, since he has social dating anxiety, any knowledge and experience he does gain tend to go right out the window just when he needs them. If you have this issue, here are some strategies to help you out. Think of them as very fundamental approaches, instead of specific tips that may or may not work in certain situations.
Firstly, DO be aware of the differing social expectations for men and women. Women’s lib and Girls Gone Wild aside, the idea that a man has to make the first move is still deeply ingrained in many women. Given this fact, you should not expect a lot of women to approach you first. You do need to be willing to make the first move sometimes, despite your social dating anxiety.
Secondly, DON’T expect serious relationships right away. No, do not take this to mean that a person with social dating anxiety cannot have serious relationships. This is actually a general tip for most men. Though the stereotype is that women are marriage-crazy, men can be that way, too, which often leads them to put too much pressure on initial encounters. Have a more open attitude as to the direction of a possible relationship.
Finally, DO accept that you will not always succeed, no matter how desirable you are. Also, rejection should not be taken too hard. After all, people all have different standards. Perhaps that person was not ready for a relationship at the time. (Love is about timing. If you want a painstaking illustration of this, go see the movies of Wong Kar-Wai—which also happen to be excellent date movies.) With a realistic, balanced perspective, social dating anxiety becomes a lot more manageable.
For more information on social anxiety, visit:
http://anxietynomore.co.uk/blog/
http://socialanxietyblog.blogspot.com/
http://socialanxietydisorder.about.com/od/copingwithsad/a/meetpeople.htm
http://www.chickjunk.com/5-rules-defeating-date-anxiety/
