Online Dating Anxiety

By Dan Girard

Most people don’t know “why” they are afraid of public speaking. They just know that they ARE afraid. Recent studies rank the fear of public speaking, a.k.a.stage fright or Glossophobia, in the top 5 of all fears. That’s pretty high considering its companions on that list are fear of spiders, fear of heights, and even the fear of death. Think about that for a minute, there are people who would rather die than to speak publicly. Sounds crazy, right? The sad truth is it’s not that crazy.

You may be wondering “why AM I afraid to speak publicly?” For most people the underlying reason is a fear of failure, rejection, and humiliation. The mentality of someone with this fear is that “I am afraid to make mistakes and then be humiliated in front of the audience”. While this is a legitimate fear, the reality is that you aren’t the only one to feel this and it’s OK to feel this way. The truth is, your audience does NOT want you to fail. They want you to succeed. And even if you do make a mistake, they will be understanding. The crowd will not mock your mistakes.

I want to share a story with you about me. I was a very shy, introverted child. I didn’t talk to people I didn’t know well, and I couldn’t get up on stage to do any kind of performance. I learned to play the trombone when I was about 9. I was volunteered to perform in a school play. It wasn’t my idea and I didn’t see any way around it. I practiced for a week straight and thought I was ready. On the day of the performance, I was so nervous I felt physically sick. I didn’t want to do performance. I wanted to die. So, I took a small hammer and dented the slide of the trombone enough so that it wouldn’t slide (I guess I really wanted to play drums!). I showed up to school with my “altered” instrument and proceeded to tell an elaborate story about how my trombone was damaged. Luckily there were no spares and I was allowed to skip my performance.

I want to share one other story to show you where I ended up after conquering my stage fright. By the time I got to college, I had a few tools under my belt for dealing with my fear. In my sophomore year, I became an orientation guide, giving tours of the campus to incoming freshmen and parents. For two weeks each summer I had to speak in front of groups as small as 5-6 and as large as 200 – 300. I would talk for hours, giving facts and figures, answering questions, and even entertaining the group. I later joined a dance troop that regularly performed in front of hundreds of people. Again, I used the tools I had and even developed my own tools for dealing with the stage fright. Not bad considering what I did to that poor trombone!

I tell these stories because they illustrates the lengths some people will go to in order to avoid public speaking or any kind of presentation or performance, and also to illustrate that with time and effort, you can accomplish great things by overcoming your fear.

There is good news for those of you who do suffer from this kind of panic. You can minimize the stress, anxiety, panic, and fear and even USE THIS FEAR AS A TOOL TO MAKE YOU A BETTER SPEAKER. For most people the fear can be overcome with just some simple steps, without the need for therapy (unfortunately for some, the fear is so great that some professional therapy may be needed to get you started). The key is to know how to prepare yourself for the event and how to keep yourself focused. And like everything else in life, the more you do, the better you are – that is “practice makes perfect”.

So, the next time you have to give a speech, presentation, or performance in front of a group, remember this: your fear is a tool that can help you be a better speaker. Your audience WANTS you to succeed. You just need to get up and do it.

Dan Girard is a software designer and trainer. In overcoming his own fear of public speaking, Dan has developed tools, tricks, and secrets for his own success. He has created a guide that anyone can follow to mimic his success in overcoming fear of public speaking. You can see a preview of his eBook, at http://www.publicspeakingwithoutpanic.com

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Panic anxiety attacks can be extremely hard to deal with, especially if your anxiety has a wide range of triggers and therefore strikes relatively unpredictably. Small wonder, then, that there is quite a market for ways to prevent and lessen symptoms of panic anxiety attacks. Here is the Panic Away! Review.

Get your life back with Panic Away! If you have anxiety, you need this product. Over 34,000 people have used Joe Barry’s anxiety technique online with dramatic success. Panic Away gives you immediate anxiety relief and is a natural technique to stop panic attacks fast! Watch the free video clip now.

Firstly, be aware that this program does not use any medication for controlling panic anxiety attacks. These days, medication has become a significant part of the ways people treat mood and stress problems. Medication can and does help, in many cases. However, it does have its disadvantages, particularly if said medication targets the central nervous system (brain and spine), as many anti-anxiety medications do. With Panic Away!, you can avoid these side effects, because you will not be taking any pills that target your brain. Panic Away! is one example of home treatments for anxiety and panic attacks.

In addition, Panic Away! is largely self-administered. Once you purchase the program, you do not need to rely on somebody else to manage and prevent panic anxiety attacks. The first and most obvious advantage of this is the convenience. It will not be necessary to tailor your schedule in order to fit that of a partner or therapist, for example. There is also no hypnosis involved, which is great for people who worry about putting themselves in another person’s control in such a manner.

Besides all this, Panic Away! tackles one of the root causes of panic anxiety attacks, i.e. fear of getting a panic attack. It is a well-known irony that the more you worry about getting an attack, the more likely you are to actually end up with one. By getting rid of this fear, or at least making it more tolerable, you are more likely to prevent attacks from occurring at all. Other programs, on the other hand, often focus on addressing the symptoms of a panic attack. You cannot really put them to use until you are just about to have an attack, or are already in the middle of one. Needless to say, you are not exactly in the best shape to implement a complex step-by-step strategy during such moments. Actually, should you try to implement the usual programs and fail to stop your attack quickly, you are likely to get even more anxious, thus worsening the current attack and/or hastening the onset of the next one. In contrast, this program takes advantage of your calmer moments, during which you can more easily take command of your mind and body.

Lastly, this program has just a few simple steps. It does not take too long to learn how to do, nor does it require long meditation or exercise routines. Of course, meditation and exercise are both healthy and effective, but not everybody has the time to do them regularly. This program was clearly designed with the contemporary, perpetually busy urban person in mind, and takes into account the limitations they must deal with in terms of addressing their anxiety panic attacks.

If you are in need of ways to handle anxiety panic attacks, do try this program out. You can download Panic Away!instantly to your computer right now to get the help you need.

Anxiety disorders—particularly those that have to do with social situations—are often divided into two categories: specific and generalized. A specific anxiety disorder has anxiety symptoms that are triggered by very particular stimuli, or the thought of particular stimuli. For example, a person may become very anxious at the prospect of having to get up on a stage. On the other hand, the disorder may be more generalized, in which case the generalized anxiety disorder symptoms cannot easily be traced to a particular trigger.

• Generalized anxiety disorder, or GAD, is basically when a person tends to worry far too much about many everyday things, even when it is not likely that something is about to go wrong. The person always seems to be expecting something bad to happen. However, this is more than just simple pessimism. The person will be experiencing physical symptoms of anxiety and depression as well. These can include headaches, insomnia, nausea, muscle pains, and skin rash, as well has having a hard time breathing and swallowing. In addition, it must be noted that a brief onset of the symptoms is not going to be enough to induce an authentic diagnosis of GAD. You should have the symptoms for at least six months, and experience your irrational worry for the majority of days over that time. The waiting game might be a terrible experience for people who think they might have GAD, but there are reasons to make sure that a diagnosis is not being made prematurely. After all, pulling out drastic treatment measures for what turns out to be a passing problem may also damage the patient’s physical and mental health.

• Anxiety symptoms similar to those of generalized anxiety disorder may manifest themselves due to other, more physiological or pharmacological causes. For example, they may be the result of drug abuse, or may be side effects of drugs a patient is taking for another problem. The body itself may have a physiological problem (such as hormonal imbalance) that leads to the appearance of the symptoms. These other possibilities must not be ignored, lest a misdiagnosis occur.

You might think that anxiety disorders just mean a very persistent, grave sort of nervousness—especially if you do not have a disorder yourself. However, they and the attendant anxiety symptoms can be very serious and scary—even terrifying. We refer here to phobias, which are classified under anxiety disorders, partly because sufferers experience man of the anxiety symptoms, but often with more gravity. People who have extreme difficulty socializing might actually have social phobia, which can cripple their attempts to make practical networks, and even to find romance.

• In brief, a phobia is an unreasonable terror of some specific thing. People can be scared of snakes, heights, the dark, etc. Phobias are not just annoying fears that give you nightmares and make you nervous. The can have a huge practical impact on your life. Let us take the case of actress Olivia Hussey, whose career looked very promising after she starred in Franco Zeffirelli’s adaptation of Romeo and Juliet. However, she had agoraphobia, and the symptoms of anxiety were so bad that she had a hard time doing what was expected of a young “star.”

• If you have social phobia, do not by any means convince yourself that many types of social interaction are forever beyond your reach. A phobia can be treated in a variety of ways. Some people prefer cognitive therapy, which involves, among other things, turning rational thinking on irrational feelings and impulses. The professional helping you might ask you to examine the reasons behind your fears, and the reasons behind your reasons. Still, this might not be enough to get rid of the root behind your anxiety symptoms. Elements of behavioral psychology may be introduced into your treatment so that you learn to associate the object of your fear with positive stimuli. In terms of social phobia, support groups can also be very helpful. Dates and other types of in-depth interaction might seem a bit scary at first, but with hard work and the right programs, you can learn to manage your fear, and open yourself up to better interpersonal relationships.

Anxiety panic attacks are a distinguishing characteristic of the condition known as panic disorder. People afflicted with this disorder tend to live under a sort of self-fulfilling prophecy. They worry a great deal about having more anxiety panic attacks, and the worry tends to trigger these attacks. A person might have a single attack lasting only a few minutes, but there can be worse incidents in which short attacks follow each other in quick succession over several hours.

Panic Disorder and Relationships

If possible, and if your attacks are very frequent and unpredictable, you might think about warning your date partner about them. If an attack occurs, your date might then be able to take some action or call for appropriate help. Anxiety panic attacks can be very serious, and you should not be embarrassed about asking another person to help you stay safe. You might think that the fact that you have these attacks will be a turn-off to some potential date partners, and this might be the case sometimes. Then again, you might not want to date that kind of person anyway.

If you are on the other end of the equation, and are dating a person who has anxiety panic attacks symptoms, do remain calm yourself if an attack occurs. Treat the situation seriously, and ask if there are any basic measures you can take in case of an attack.

Panic Disorder and Other Conditions

Anxiety panic attacks are often mistaken for heart attacks, given that the symptoms are very much alike. As a result, many people run to the emergency room, thinking that they are going into cardiac arrest, when they have actually had a panic attack instead. The panic attack is not always correctly diagnosed. The patient may go home not knowing what happened, which might make him or her even more anxious, and thus triggering another attack in the near future. Being aware of and understanding your condition are important in terms of helping you to relax and have a plan in place in case an attack does occur.